October 1, 2013

• Betrayals and Broken Hearts

  Sometimes the justifications others give for their betrayals and wrongdoings makes me want to beat them with a reality stick. My husband’s eldest daughter is getting married next year, and she won’t let her father walk her down the aisle, claiming that walking her down the aisle is a privilege and just because he’s her dad doesn’t give him that privilege, which is true, but never mind the 16 years he did raise her and was in her life on a daily basis, I certainly think that counts for something; 16 years of love compared to less than 4 years of real issues within their relationship, in my opinion, doesn’t give HER the right to deny him of something he’s thought about since she was conceived, I think that’s disgusting, and unimaginably hurtful, spiteful, and unreasonably passive aggressive. I just don’t understand that, it breaks my heart. My father had never really been in my life and I still offered for him to walk me down the aisle, even after over 20 years of tears and heartbreak, I at least wanted to give him the opportunity. My father did not end up walking me down the aisle, my grandfather did, and he was probably more deserving of that because he was the only steady male role model I ever had, and he loved me. I just don’t understand denying a man, who was there the vast majority of your life, the joy and the happiness of giving you away.

  These actions will seal the fate of their relationship, and it will shatter it forever, it’s salvageable now, but my husband shouldn’t be the one putting forth all of the effort to mend it, she’s an adult and needs to extend some love and forgiveness as well. He forgave her for unimaginable legal accusations, legal accusations that I feel had a big part in tarnishing the relationship he had with his children, with the assistance of his ex-wife. His ex-wife told him not to contact his children until the “legal investigation” was over, she told him that she would let him know… it was over a year before we found out, from a different source, that the investigation was dropped within the same month, he could have been speaking with his children that whole time, and was never made aware that he could, being that every communication ended with “Do not contact them again or else.” She told him not to speak to them, but when his children would ask why he wasn’t calling she would blame him as if he didn’t want to talk to them, she never called, emailed or texted that the “hold” was over, and that he could resume interaction. I watched that man cry several times a week for over a year because of this, and after that nothing was ever the same, everything was broken. I wonder if they all know that… I wonder. I wonder if they would even listen to the truth if they were given the opportunity, probably not.

  With the relationship with his eldest daughter coming to a close, I can only hope that the relationship with his other two daughters can be salvaged. I want nothing more than for all of their hearts to be mended and for them all to find happiness together. If  I could give my husband anything, it would be that.

  We all must give love to receive it, you cannot withhold your love and expect love to be given to you… I feel that is what’s happening, everyone is withholding their love, for one reason or another, but you can’t make sense out of nonsense… if you love someone, give it freely, even if you’re afraid to, and if it doesn’t come back to you, then your conscience can rest easy knowing that you tried. I hope this situation can be rectified with love and understanding. If they can all forgive each other, I think the outcome will be pleasing to all.

  • 5:01 pm
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