February 25, 2008
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Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)...
I was thinking of all my problems today... I'm broke, I haven't found a job yet, I have no relationship with my father, my brother should be in a cage at a zoo under "Rare Species", and the rest of my family could use a straight jacket and maybe a couple Prozac... but then I got to thi nking of all the good things in my life, including the advice I have been given over the years.
Sometimes my frustration level elevates and my mood can turn a little sour, so to speak. I am blessed to have a fiance with enough balls and courage to tell me "Calm down, take a deep breath... (who-ever-it-is-at-the-time) is not the enemy." *chuckles* I have immense respect for him because he is not afraid to do that... a weaker man would have crumbled under the anxiety of what I may do or say to him. So yeah, he keeps my "tude" in check... he is a very brave man indeed.Speaking of "anxiety," I do suffer from it. Not having a job is starting to get to me, it worries me. I try not to worry and every time I do I am reminded of what my grandmother says about worrying, something my fiance and I repeat to each other quite often.
"The hippopotamus of worry hunkers down in the mire of muddy thinking."Funny, I know... but the humor itself has a calming effect. Believe it or not, this post is not about my problems, oh no. This post is about advice. Not advice for me... just the topic of advice itself. Today I have been thinking about all of the "advice" I have been given over the years, some are good... others I have taken, reshaped and then applied to my life. For instance:
"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."What a lie that is and horrible advice to give. It's completely false. I have met a lot of people who have been so wounded by their experiences that they can no longer function in society... and I believe it is because they didn't have someone telling them the truth about what didn't kill them. The proper advice?
"Life hits hard sometimes, what doesn't kill you makes or breaks you. You decide."Good advice? I know. The truth in a lot of peoples lives is that what didn't kill them might as well have... but that was their decision. Anyway...
There were a lot of things I grew up hearing: "Fools names and fools faces are often seen in public places." or "Don't look a gift horse in the mouth." Wanna know the ones that really stuck with me? There is a lot. There is a song, however, that speaks of many of the things I have taken to heart over the years, I thought of it today while I was pondering "good advice." Listen to it... it may just be what you need to hear.
Comments (22)
:ssgrin: I think back to what I felt were the greatest problems in my life at your age. From you're current view, I'm sure life seems very stressful right now. I'm not going to minimze how you feel, because at this time, these things are stressful.
Think of it as training for later on in your life. lol It is not as important to get it right all the time as it is to experience it. Then learn from what you experience. Both Bad and Good, stressful and stressfree situations have to arise to give you the tools you will need to tackle life.
The best advise I ever received in how to handle problems had to do with divide and conquer. Make a list of the 5 things that are bothering you. write them down! then arange them in priority of importance to you at this time. than set realistic time frames to deal them.
once your list is made and you have your priorities. now take action. It's is amazingly simple, but i've never found it not to work, even when it didn't feel like it could.
You are smart and good looking. You are already ahead of 90% of the population. Go get em!
Oh yea, you think it is tough now, lol, just wait till you have kids.....lol:ssgoofywink:
@Skalder - Hahahah, well... I'm not really asking for advice in my post and I'm not really THAT stressed... just thought I would give everyone else the opportunity to remember the advice they have been given. Ane I think that advice can be cool, a lot of the time creative... I like the "divide and conquer" advice... very useful.
Very nice post. Thank you for quoting my advice. I made that one up for Grandpa, but you and your affianced one have an affinity for it, that's good. As for advice, I usually get mine from the Good Book and I repeat it as needed.."What time I am afraid, I will trust in Thee." Our Lord says that He will never leave us or forsake us. That's good news. We all fall into the flesh from time to time and into a funk, but we can get out of the muck. Keep looking up and press on. The Lord provides. Love, G-Maw
You'll find a job. You just have to keep at it.
My mother always told "a half loaf of bread is better than no loaf at all" and maybe more importantly she always said "que sera sera"
Generally, as I look back, my parents have given me the best advice......and still do. I am very thankful for them.....and although I could quote things here, it generally is dependant on the situation.....and God has also shown me to expect the unexpected.....even when it comes to where His advice is going to emanate from.....
idunno about the best...but -pretty good? --once this nice young lady called me and exorted me to listen to a song....
ryc: disfunction = story of my life
and thank you for the hugs
the mini actually made me smile, hehe.
we're pretty much alike in the family area... i live in a house full of morons, and my dad's a stranger to me. I see him twice a year, and believe me, that's way more than enough.
I can't say that I've ever been given amazing advice. All of it has come back and bitten me in the ass, so I don't really listen to it anymore.
The best advice I got was "Doe wel en zie niet om"
My father gives everyone this advice
1) Figure out where you want to live and live there
2) Figure out what it is that you like doing
3) Figure out how to make a living doing that
He's a wise, wise man.
I think I've reached the point in life where I've gone through so many disappointments, that I can't rely on anyone for anything.
But.. there are people in the world who will look at you as a weak person, and will charge at you with all their might. That's what happened today, and I'm trying my hardest not to fall down. Not exactly easy...
I've just been feeling kinda down for a million and one reasons lately. My Xanga posts will be happier soon. If not, I'll probably go on a hiatus til I can figure things out...
Thanks! I'm actually feeling a little better.
Here's a quote of advice that I've always liked. "If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything." Sometimes it's hard to judge whether your heart is pointing you in the right direction. So, as hard as it is (especially for me), I think it would be wise to follow your conscience instead of your heart.
What is the best advice that you have ever been given?
To keep my mouth shut - ha
and I gave it to myself... haha
seriously it is the best advice sometimes... now if I could just learn to follow it.
One of the better pieces of advice given to me that I've tried to heed as much as possible: "If you don't have something nice to say, it's best not to say anything at all"........and although I am not always the best at following that, I really wish other folks would heed it as much as I try to. But too often, folks feel "justified" in being in a bad mood, or think everyone else around them "owes them" something or even the idea that everyone else around them should just "deal with it" when it comes to one of their "bad moods"..........
I think one of these days, I am going to ACTUALLY bite part of my tongue off....literally......
God's Canvas
thats so beautiful
for some reason...I still believe in the "what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger" ....it keeps me going! :ssgrin:
Cat! where is your message box?!
I sent your Gram some mail art on tuesday so it should be there anytime... will you make sure she gets it! I sent her a message, but haven't heard back.
@angi1972 - Mine? On Xanga? It's right under my profile pic... I'll let her know..
You are wise far beyond your years. I've always hated that "Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger" saying too. Ugh.
My parents, alas, weren't very wise, but they did impart a few choice morsels of advice:
Mother: "Save your ammunition for the big things." She rarely took her own advice, unfortunately.
Dad: "Never expect anything from anyone. Then you won't be disappointed." This to me is a sad commentary on the human condition, but unfortunately contains more than a grain of truth. He was a lonely man, but apparently seldom disappointed.
A Christian tract I once read: "Trouble will make you either BITTER or BETTER." It went on to explain that we can choose our response to adversity.
The only bit of wisdom I've ever been able to come up with that might count as an aphorism is this: "There is no misery like a joy unshared."
A couple more:
My mother: "This too shall pass." She was correct. Adversity usually comes to an end eventually, to be replaced by even greater adversity.
In the men's room at a Mexican restaurant last night: "Never take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night."
@Eccentrique - My grandmother tell me the same thing "this too shall pass" she reminds me of it a lot. I think that the "Trouble will make you either BITTER or BETTER." goes along the lines of what I think about what doesn't kill you. And I will keep your wisdom about sleeping pills and laxatives in mind. LOL
:sssmile:everybody's free to wear sunscreen
one of mine and my daughter's favorites. life's little instruction booklet right there. we first heard it when she was in high school. a combined favorite verse, "live in northern california once, but leave before it makes you soft, live in NYC once, but leave before it makes you hard"
we are both born and raised northern californians. i have never left here except to move further north for six months for my dad's temporary assignment in Clearlake Oaks, CA. I am very soft. She has gone to college in NYC, third year now! she's getting a little hard, but I think just the right amount.
we also both like, the race is long and at the end,it is only with yourself.
congratulations!!!! on your engagement. how wonderful for you. I wish you all the best
L:ssalien:
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